Hi. My name is Peter Redwood-Smith.

I’m 29 years old and from Rayleigh, Essex.

I am a former long distance runner and fundraiser.

Who has raised awareness and tens of thousands of pounds for worthy causes in the past.

I took a lot of time out from running.

And haven’t ran an organised event in 5 years.

Whilst I tried to motivate myself and to find the love for running again over the years.

I struggle with my mental health especially when it comes to self care.

Finding it easier to care for and about other people than myself.

I think it’s why I found it easier to train and run long distance when I was fundraising.

Knowing I was putting some good out in to the world.

When I say that I struggle with my mental health.

I don’t mean the odd bad day.

Deep depression and anxiety takes its toll on me.

And I’ve been hanging on by a thread for some time.

Sometimes I can’t leave the house.

Crawl out of bed, work or do housework.

Just functioning and doing the simplest tasks.

Some days I can’t sleep.

Others I spend the whole day sleeping just to escape.

I have attempted to take my life (once) in the past.

And whilst I’ve wanted to act on it since.

There hasn’t been another attempt.

But I have self harmed, abused alcohol and put myself in to dangerous situations.

As I believed my life had no value and I wanted for it to end.

I’ve pushed a lot of people away who cared about me and whom I cared about.

Thinking that I was doing the right thing.

That they were better off for it.

As I’ve caused a lot of worry and hurt to the people that have loved me.

But the truth is the world is hard enough already.

And it’s really quite lonely when you isolate yourself from the world.

I’m trying to turn my life around.

To start putting good out in to the world again.

Whilst improving my own health and well-being in the process.

Having not ran a marathon in years.

I’ve signed up for Brighton Marathon which is in April.

Training from 5KM to 26.2 miles in less than a month.

I’ll be running every day leading up to Brighton.

And whilst I don’t know if I can build up the distance in time.

I will be giving this my all!

A real challenge to work towards.

Your support would mean a lot to me.

Raising funds for a cause that is very close to my heart.

Will hopefully keep me moving forwards.

Rather than slipping back in to that dark place.

Which I’ve fought very hard to step out from.

And I’m going to try my very best to support others running for their own fantastic reasons.

Whether they are running in memory of a loved one.

Raising funds for charity.

Or just working on their own health and well-being.

I have a lot of love for the running community which I have missed being a part of.

Should you want to sponsor me towards Brighton Marathon please do ❤️

Thank you to everyone for your support.